Teens these days are becoming more and more aggressive toward their parents, their friends, their schools and even themselves. The numbers are growing at an alarming rate of six to ten percent of the general population, with an even higher percentage in teen males.
The aggression is not always a physical act. Teens dealing with aggressive behavior issues can lash out verbally at anyone in close proximity. With threatening remarks and lashing out physically as the main outlets for the aggression, teens with aggressive behaviors require non-escalatory communication and carefully chosen consequences.
Although simple parenting techniques can help at times, such as implementing consequences that match the offense, parenting a teen that has shown aggression requires specific parenting skills.
So parents this is what I’ve learned:
You are not crazy!
Typical parenting techniques don’t always work. Teens with abnormal aggressive behavior need to be parented differently to ensure that the aggressive outbursts are kept to a minimum. Safety is a priority for you, other children in the home and the aggressive teen.
Aggression negatively impacts your teen.
Aggressive behavior in children can negatively affect the way that they learn and the way that they interact with others. Joining forces with your teen’s school counselor, social worker, and teacher as allies can significantly help your teen succeed in school.
Your needs matter.
Acknowledging your needs as parent is just as important as recognizing your teen’s needs. The use of non-violent or escalatory communication is the best possible way to keep the truth open with the teen and keeps the relationship strong between the two of you without overstepping one another’s boundary.
Proper intervention into aggressive behaviors can help steer you away from escalatory communication that can exacerbate the aggressive behaviors you are trying to suppress. If you are dealing with an aggressive teen, we invite you to check out other articles in the free resources section of our site, or engage in one of our programs.
As always, here at Breaking the Cycle, we encourage you to stay safe.
